Say to wisdom, "you are my sister" and make understanding your closest friend. For they will keep you from the immoral woman... Proverbs 7:4-5a

Women’s Discipleship Group – 2006
HELPMATES, HANDMAIDENS & HARLOTS ON-LINE BIBLE STUDY
FAMILY LIFE SERIES
LESSON #1 FAMILY LOVE
Website: www.terrimcfaddin.org
Presented by: Terri McFaddin Solomon

Definitions: Helpmate – Handmaiden – Harlot
Helpmate: A married woman who is committed to the well being of her husband.
Handmaiden: An unmarried or married woman who is committed to serving the Lord.
Harlot: An unmarried or married woman who will sacrifice her soul or body for personal gain.

SCRIPTURE FOCUS:
Helpmates:
Joshua 2:12 – Now then, please swear to me by the LORD that you will show kindness to my family, because I have shown kindness to you.

Handmaidens:
Joshua 2:17 – (LB) All your family members—your father, mother, brothers, and all your relatives—must be here inside the house. If they go out into the street, they will be killed, and we cannot be held to our oath.

Harlots:
Joshua 6:25 – (LB)But Joshua spared Rahab the harlot, with her family and all who belonged to her, because she hid the men Joshua had sent as spies to Jericho—and her whole family lived among the Israelites.

OPENING STATEMENT:
My Story:
When I was a girl growing up in the city of Philadelphia, every summer we would go down south to visit our relatives. I can remember helping my Grandma Shelly make grape jelly while she told me stories. On other days I would get up with my brother and sisters at the break of dawn and go pick tomatoes and string beans and get paid 50 cents a basket. But nothing was more fun than playing cards and games at Cousin Ivy and Cousin Mac’s house. They had twelve children and lived in a four-room shack with no indoor toilet or running water. But believe me when I tell you, my brother, sisters and I couldn’t wait to go play at Cousin Ivy’s house. They didn’t have much furniture and the house was loaded down with all kinds of flying and crawling bugs. We either brushed them aside or gave them a swat and kept right on playing our games. Most of my cousins who grew up in that bug infested shack went on to college or landed a good job and started wonderful families of their own. I learned from that experience that success is not always based on the opportunities and privileges that we have as children. It’s love, fun, respect, encouragement and family unity that cause us to thrive as adults. In the helpmates, handmaidens and harlots section, I have provided words of wisdom and encouragement that will hopefully strengthen your family ties.

The Helpmate’s Story
The Helpmate has been called by God to care for her family. If she is walking with the Lord, she has a special anointing to bring love, unity and strength to her husband and children. But sometimes it can be challenging for one woman to juggle the roles of wife, mother, daughter, sister and aunt to your family members. I’m sure you have stories to tell about the ups and downs of loving and supporting your family. For better or for worse you belong to one another. I’ve never heard anyone say, “She’s my former sister.” “He’s my former uncle.” Even when we’re dead and gone, we will live on in the hearts of our family members. As a helpmate I want you to consider the following ways that you can be a blessing to your family.

Prayer: Sometimes when you try to tell your husband or other family members what they should or should not do, it’s like spitting in the wind. Either your words create hard feelings, cause misunderstandings, or they fall on deaf ears. But when you decide to stop talking (sometimes viewed as nagging) and start praying, the Lord will give you the peace that passes all understanding and resolve your family situation without you having to say another word. James 5:16 (NIV) – The prayer of the righteous is powerful and effective.

Praise: Don’t you love to be around people who make you feel good about yourself? That’s why you should always find something good to say about your husband and other family members. If the Lord loves to hear your praises, then your husband, children, mom, dad, sisters and brothers should also hear from your lips that they are loved, respected and appreciated. Be generous with your words of praise and watch a miracle take place in your family. Proverbs 31:28 – Her children stand and bless her. Her husband praises her also.

Priorities: The people and things that are the most important to you can be seen in how you spend your time and money. I know that it’s necessary for husbands and wives to spend time at work and taking care of a variety of obligations. But what does it matter if the bills are paid and you never miss choir rehearsal but your marriage is falling apart? Get together with your mate and make a renewed commitment to start spending more time together. Putting your husband and children at the top of your “to do list,” will open up new lines of communication and strengthen your family bond. Revelations 2:4 – Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love.

The Handmaiden's Story:
The 2nd chapter of the book of Joshua tells the story of Rahab the harlot. When two spies were sent into the city of Jericho to gather information for a planned invasion, they went to Rahab’s house and asked for her help. In spite of her questionable lifestyle, it is clear that her greatest concern was the welfare of her family. Joshua 2:12 – Now then, please swear to me by the LORD that you will show kindness to my family, because I have shown kindness to you. Many handmaidens are not married but they bring strength and support to their families. Some are single parents, or raising cousins, nephews and nieces. They help with family expenses or the care for elderly or disabled parents. Like Rahab, they live in cities that are on the brink of moral and spiritual destruction. I promise you that if you put the following plan into practice you will see miracles take place in your family.

Principles: When you are brave enough to establish and maintain a standard of living that is based on godly principles, your family members will take notice. In order for your family members to make the right choices in life, they need a godly example that is clearly demonstrated. When this happens you will be the one that they turn to you in times of difficulty. After they have gone through a few bumps and bruises, the principles that govern your life will be the guiding light that will help them find the path to a victorious life in Christ Jesus. Psalm 119:80 May I be blameless in keeping your principles; then I will never have to be ashamed.

Patience: The demonstration of real patience is to be steadfast and prayerful, despite opposition, difficulty or adversity. The Word of God says that we must let patience have its perfect work. (James 1:4). Give the people in your family a chance to get it right. But at the same time it is important to set boundaries for what you will and will not tolerate. Don’t allow family members to get high in your presence. Don’t allow them to use excessive profanity or disrespect people in your presence. But even when they mess up, let them know that you love them and always be willing to give them another chance.

Perseverance: Patience requires that we be still and wait on the Lord to change things. Perseverance requires that we take action and keep doing what God requires to help your families survive. You may be required to take care of a sickly parent or work in a family business and hope you’ll get paid. James 5:11- As you know, we consider blessed, those who have persevered. Johnson & Johnson; Ford Motor Company, Hilton Hotels and many other family businesses became successful because of perseverance, patience and family unity. When you persist without becoming discouraged, the Lord will reward you for your deeds.

The Harlot’s Story:
Even though Rahab was a harlot, the Lord looked beyond her current condition and provided a way for her to escape. When the city of Jericho was destroyed, she and her family were the only survivors. We must recognize that many women like Rahab live a life of harlotry because they can’t see another way to provide for their family. But when the Lord made a way for Rahab and her family to escape, she was smart enough to take it. Before the men left they told her, “We can guarantee your safety if you leave this scarlet rope hanging from the window.” The scarlet rope represented the protection that comes to those who are covered with the blood of Jesus. If you and your family are living a life that is leading to destruction, the Lord has provided a way to escape (1 Corinthians 10:13). The way is Jesus and the steps are simple.

Prayer: Ask the Lord to forgive your sins and to cleanse you of all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9 – If you confess your sins, the Lord is faithful to forgive you and to cleanse you of all unrighteousness.). Don’t allow the Devil to persuade you that you are not worthy of God’s forgiveness. He knows that if you leave the kingdom of darkness and walk into the light of Christ, (much like Rahab) your family will soon follow. So keep praying and don’t be discouraged if the changes in your family don’t take place overnight.

Promises: Just as the two spies promised to deliver Rahab and her family, we must learn to stand on the promises that the Lord has made to us in His Word. When you dedicate your life to the Lord, He makes promises to you that will also cover your family. When a frightened jailer asked what he had to do to be saved, Paul and Silas answered him with a promise that affected his household: (Acts 16:31) – And they said, “Believe on the Lord Jesus and you will be saved, along with your entire family. Please know that when the Lord blesses you He always includes your family. (1 Chronicles 17:16) – And now, it has pleased you to bless me and my family so that our dynasty will continue forever before you. For when you grant a blessing, O LORD, it is an eternal blessing!”

YOUR STORY:
Write me a story about a family member who has been a special blessing in your life. Email your favorite family photos. If room permits, we will show your photos online.

OBSERVATIONS AND PERSONLIZATION:
Helpmate: Read Joshua 2:1-4
1. If two spies came to your house and let you know that your city was about to be destroyed what prayer would you pray on behalf of your family?

2. In light of the dangers found in the world, what action can you take to protect your family? Find a scripture that supports your action.

Handmaiden: Read Joshua 2:8-11
1. What did Rahab know about the God of Israel?

2. What do you believe about God’s ability to protect your family? Find a scripture to support your belief.

Harlot: Read Joshua 2:17-19
1. What kind of deal was made between Rahab and the two spies?

2. What can you do to persuade your family members to “come into the house?” Find a scripture to support your view.

How Women's Discipleship Group Got Started

The Women's Discipleship Group was organized in 1999 by Terri McFaddin and Janet Bailey. The purpose of the discipleship group was to assist women in becoming rooted and grounded in their Christian faith. It was designed to also help women reach the level of spiritual maturity that would enable them to use their gifts and talents in various arenas of service and ministry.

We move toward these goals by implementing the following principles:

1. Building spiritual strength by a systematic study of the Word of God, including prayer; memorizing scriptures and weekly meetings.

2. Building strong relationships within the discipleship groups. This includes encouraging one another and being sensitive and supportive of one another's needs.

3. Training women to become servants and ministry leaders in their churches, mission fields, communities, schools, businesses or wherever God has called them to serve.

What We Believe

The women of WDG are a mixture of many different Christian denominations. But we all believe that we have eternal life through our personal confession of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. We believe that the entire Word of God is true and we govern our actions by the counsel of the Holy Bible. We believe that we are called by God to be examples of godliness by loving one another and ministering to those who are in need of our help.

About Terri McFaddin Solomon

Terri is an ordained minister, author, speaker and songwriter with two Grammy Awards to her credit. Terri co-wrote two theme songs for the movies: Big and Men In Black . She authored three books: God Made Me Beauty-full ; Only A Woman and Sapphires And Other Precious Jewels.

Terri was born and raised in Philadelphia, where she attended Temple University. She holds a Masters Degree in Theology from Fuller Theological Seminary.

In 1999 she and close friend Janet Bailey, founded WDG, which prepares women for service in various areas of ministry. There are currently five WDG bible studies taking place in various locations.

In October, 2005, Terri married Charles Solomon and resides in Los Angeles. She is a member of Faithful Central Bible Church and the mother of two adult daughters, Roslyn and Theresa who are also in the ministry.